NW Democrat-Gazette

Outrage on display

St. Patty’s Day items can really assault the senses

Gary Smith is a recovering journalist living in Rogers.

In keeping with the spirit of the moment (or temporary insanity — sometimes it’s hard to tell these days), I’m going to voice my outrage at the sheer audacity of major retailers to push particular products to me despite my completely unobvious lack of desire to buy it or the fact that its placement should in no way offend or even surprise me.

In other words, I’m going to tell you all I’m mad even though I have no reason to be mad and, in fact, it’s kind of silly that I’m mad. I mean, it works for my preschool grandkids, so maybe it will work here.

So here goes: I’m tired of being hit with displays for particular seasonal products every time I walk into a store. I mean, at certain times of year, retailers just shove it right in my face, despite the fact that I don’t want to buy it. I can’t get away from it. OK, I can just walk past it like I do about a thousand other displays for stuff I don’t want, but that’s not the point. I see an opportunity to vent and be offended here and I’m going to take it.

I’m sick and tired of having to see displays for St. Patrick’s Day merchandise.

It is right there, everywhere I go. OK, not right this minute. I mean, St. Patrick’s Day has been over for a bit so if any of that merchandise is still out, it’s likely over on those strange shelves where you buy 4th of July stuff in September or odd dog toys. But if there’s one thing I can do successfully, it’s hold a grudge.

And at the moment that grudge is directed straight at the constant (OK, for a few weeks in early spring, but for that period of time, it seems like a lot) display of green hats and buttons and T-shirts and stuff that visibly assaults me every time I walk in a store.

Provided I’ve been able to switch from my sunglasses to my regular glasses in time to notice. Or before I run into another display for, I don’t know, Cheetos or something else because I was momentarily blinded during the transition.

Or provided I even noticed the displays because I enter most stores pretty much intent on finding whatever it is I came for and not getting hit by someone else’s cart. Not necessarily in that order.

In other words, if I weren’t oblivious, I’d be offended. Or probably not, because it’s St. Patrick’s Day and some people are into that kind of thing. But that doesn’t mean, particularly in this day and age, that I can’t easily whip up some good old-fashioned misplaced anger for no reason at all.

I mean, who are these people to tell me I have to celebrate a holiday that honors the Irish culture and allows us to appreciate the positive impact those of Irish ancestry have had on the nation? OK, so no one is telling me I have to celebrate. But you get the point. You do? Because I’m not always sure I’m very clear.

But on those occasions when I am clear (fewer and farther between than you’d expect) I can really muster some faux outrage and misplaced indignation over all this St. Patrick’s stuff.

I mean, who are they to get a holiday, even one I don’t have to participate in and can easily avoid? OK, sure, baseline, they’re people of Irish heritage who want to celebrate that. Or, since this is America and we tend to appropriate every holiday and make it about drinking, anyone else who wants to.

So you can see why I’m mad here. Well, you’ll likely have to squint really hard (might I suggest switching from sunglasses to regular glasses? I’ve found that makes all the difference) but you can see.

Or maybe you can’t. No matter. It makes no difference if there is any logical reason for me to be offended by displays in stores. Logic often has very little to do with it. I want to get mad and I get to.

And I’m so mad about this St. Patrick’s Day stuff, the next time I’m in a store during that time of the year, I’m going to smash a display. I mean, likely not on purpose. That “switching glasses” thing. One time I took out a display of garden tools and I definitely don’t have a dog in that fight…

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2023-06-02T07:00:00.0000000Z

2023-06-02T07:00:00.0000000Z

https://edition.nwaonline.com/article/282093461124556

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